Today in our prayers for the people of Madagascar.

Prayer for Peace

Tammy Lay

God,
I planted my feet in places today I am not proud to say aloud.
I spoke words in spaces today that may have created ill will.
I leaned into the easy, and that decision may have moved my energies in negative ways.
I fell today.
Why did I choose such?

I am saying to you that I see it, I feel it, I broke a little because of it.
I lost because of it.
I gave away a little piece of me because of it.
What does it mean to now say, “I am so sorry” to you…in prayer?

Because speaking it aloud to you in such a sacred space as life is?
Brings discomfort. And some shame. And a bit of the child in me who does not want to disappoint.

But I did it, and I am sorry. And I cannot feel your grace. This frustration with self runs deep, and it won’t easily allow grace to enter.

Scripture tells me, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God.” I did not make peace today. And I am standing here, with you, in this space of holy connection…asking to be held by your grace in ways I can recognize. I want to pick myself up. I am already moving my feet out of the places I planted them and moving back closer into the spaces and places where I live in you, God.

Because therein lies the peacemaking. I will stand. My voice will speak words that offer harmony. My soul will lean into the hard work of proclaiming justice. And I will take your most precious gift of grace and carry it close.

When I fall again? I will fall again, again, again…into the forgetting of and the knowing of your ever-present unconditional love. It saves, comforts, empowers. Freely given gifts that will guide me out of the fall of forgetting, back into the full knowing of living in you.

Amen, my creator. …Amen.